okay pat passed out under dana's car
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
