dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
