Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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