8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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