I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
please come you make the beer taste better
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
