YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
