Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
All the doctor said was why
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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