Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
