Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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