i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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