the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I stole a fireplace last night.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Randomize
