im drinking this country out of the recession.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
