Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Randomize
