Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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