You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I don't think brook has ever known best
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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