I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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