So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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