yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Houston, we have a squirter
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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