Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
