perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize