Do vagina's smell?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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