Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
