I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Randomize
