After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
