You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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