Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize