Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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