nut hugger
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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