tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize