dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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