my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
