North Korea, Best Korea!
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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