Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
