We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
