theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
