just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
