Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
