you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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