i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
