Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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