do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Operation Purity has been aborted
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize