Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
