do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
