Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I think people are normalizing furries
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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