I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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