i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
do nipples grow back?
Randomize