I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Randomize
