Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
