BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
