If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Life is so much better after having sex.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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